EDSBS - Overheard in JHS Saturday

[Tiger Wench]

The main guy from EDSBS was in Jordan-Hare:

P is for Parenting. This was an actual conversation between a teenage son and his mother in the LSU section on Saturday at Jordan-Hare Stadium.

Mother: [to Cam Newton] HURT HIM! BREAK HIS KNEE!

Son: Mom, you can't want them to intentionally injure the possible Heisman winner, can you? That's not even reasonable.

Mother: Does he wear da purple and gold?

Son: Mom, you can't==

Mother: DOES HE WEAR DA PURPLE AND DA GOLD?

Son: No, ma, but--

Mother: THEN HE GOTS TO GET HOIT, SON. The Tigahs gotta win, son. YOU DO WHAT IT TAKES.

Son: [stunned]

[Townhallsavoy]

An LSU couple (about 30ish in age) sat next to my buddy and me at the game.  The girl was super cute.  Petite.  Shoulder-length blonde hair.  Attractive. 

Pregame:

"I'm a kindergarten teacher, and my husband is an accountant."
"Cool.  What part of Louisiana are you from?"
"Metairie."
"Me too!" 

1st Quarter:

Cute kindergarten teacher - "(Screaming) What the fuck, you fucking god damn moron?  Why is Jefferson playing?  Fucking shit.  Fucking god damn idiots.  (Talking privately to her husband but still loud)  This is why I fucking hate these coaches.  Fucking morons.  Fucking idiots.  I can't go to these fucking god damn games anymore because they're so fucking god damn stupid."

Halftime:
Cute kindergarten teacher - "We always like coming to Auburn."
"Yeah.  We try to be hospitable.  At least as much as we can to LSU fans." 
"Haha I understand."

3rd Quarter:
"Tackle that mother fucker!  You call this a fucking defense?  Fuck you!  Fuck all of you motherfuckers.  God damn fucking morons.   Fucking coaches.  Probably going to put that motherfucking Jefferson in god fucking damnit."

Me - 

4th Quarter:
"Fuck this fucking game." 

And they left. 

True story.

[Tiger Wench]

I was in a room with approximately 100 corndogs.  The smell was overpowering.  The phrases I kept hearing were:

GOD DAMN IT JEFFERSON!!  WHAT THA FUCK???

and

SOMEBODY TACKLE THAT GIANT MOTHERFUCKER!!!

I just grinned and asked for another glass of champagne.

[War Eagle!!!]

Sounds like my wife.

And it is fucking awesome...

[Townhallsavoy]

I was in a room with approximately 100 corndogs.  The smell was overpowering.  The phrases I kept hearing were:

GOD DAMN IT JEFFERSON!!  WHAT THA FUCK???

and

SOMEBODY TACKLE THAT GIANT MOTHERFUCKER!!!

I just grinned and asked for another glass of champagne.

The best part about being so close to the LSU section was the look on their faces after they turned the ball over at the end of the game.  They looked like someone had shot their dog.  After all the shit talking they had spewed out for the last 4 hours, it felt great to scream, "L S WHO" as loud as we could muster.

[Tiger Wench]

I just stood in front of the tv, grinning like a canary eating cat, until one of the corndogs angrily grabbed the remote and turned it off...

[AUJarhead]

"Metairie."

Are you from Metairie, or your buddy?

[Townhallsavoy]

Are you from Metairie, or your buddy?

Me.

[AUChizad]

I already mentioned the assholes sitting behind me, but to be fair, we walked to the game with the girlfriend's two LSU friends from New Orleans, and they did, for no reason, have someone yell at them to "Shove a corndog up your mommy part, BITCHES!"

[The Prowler]

"Shove a corndog up your mommy part, BITCHES!"

Now that's Southern Hospitality.

[AUChizad]

Now that's Southern Hospitality.

I thought I recognized you!

[djsimp]

Kind of a side story but funny, I use to work with a guy that was a big time LSU fan. We use to aggravate each other but it was all in fun. He loved playing music and one of the things we agreed on was several different Classic Rock bands. Well, one evening I took the Lynard Skynard song "Swamp Music" and created a wav file. Next morning I got to work early, got into his computer and made his Windows start-up chime "Swamp Music". He pretty hard of hearing so I politely tuned up his speakers for him. It was so classic. That shit was loud and it had the whole office cracking up. I got my ass chewed for that but it was worth it.

[Tiger Wench]

Me.

Did we already discuss that my husband graduated from EJ in 1980?

[AUJarhead]

Me.

What high school?  I went to Rummel, '91.

[AUJarhead]

Did we already discuss that my husband graduated from EJ in 1980?

Where did he grow up (like where in Metairie)?  EJ would have been the public high school I would have attended.  Tell him I grew up by Delta Playground, between David Drive and Roosevelt, on West Metairie.

[Snaggletiger]

My sister in law was telling me about their adventure with one "LSU Whore" as she called her that was sitting on their row.  One Auburn girl in their party, who is normally as obnoxious as most LSU fans, got into it with the LSU Whore who was spewing shit just like THS's Kindergarten teacher above.  They said everyone around them had had enough when the AU girl turns to the row behind them and says, "I need ya'll to stand up and turn around and look the other way.  I don't want no witnesses when I knock this bitch down the stairs."

[Tiger Wench]

Where did he grow up (like where in Metairie)?  EJ would have been the public high school I would have attended.  Tell him I grew up by Delta Playground, between David Drive and Roosevelt, on West Metairie.

I am not sure of the neighborhood streets but their house was kind of behind Parran's and that school with the ball fields.  His mom is in Houston now.  He is also a LOT older than you - like I said, graduated 1980.  He was a regular at the Lark Lounge.

[Townhallsavoy]

What high school?  I went to Rummel, '91.

I actually moved from New Orleans in middle school. 

I went to Phoebe Hearst. 

My dad went to Bonnabel in '76.  Isn't that Rummel's big rival? 

[AUJarhead]

I actually moved from New Orleans in middle school. 

I went to Phoebe Hearst. 

My dad went to Bonnabel in '76.  Isn't that Rummel's big rival?

Bonnabel is public school, your dad's big rivals would have been King and EJ.  Rummel is cat-lick.  We hate Shaw and Jesuit.