Prophecy

[Townhallsavoy]

Behold the works of the DKW!  He has given me sight to see into the fuuuutttttuuuurrrrrreeeeeee!!! (vibrato effect) 

Thus says the DKW...

- Florida State will finish with 1 loss, an ACC championship, a state championship, and a BCS bowl victory over the Big East champ thus making Florida State "back" and Jimbo Fisher "set up to fail." 

- One team from the Big 12 will emerge from the regular season undefeated.  It will not be Oklahoma.

- Three teams in the Big 10 will finish with 1 loss.  They will all want a say in the NC.  No one will care.

- Notre Dame will be bowl eligible, and the media will act like it's the start of the next dynasty.

- Auburn will lose to LSU but go on to beat Ole Miss, Georgia, and Alabama.  Alabama will beat LSU.  Then, on the Saturday after the Iron Bowl, Auburn will watch Arkansas beat LSU.  Then Auburn will book their tickets to the SEC championship.

- The SEC championship game will actually hurt the team that wins.  The SEC East is a schedule strength killer.

- Lane Kiffin will not understand being on probation and will book a team flight to Glendale anyway.

- West Virginia will finish with one loss - the one loss came to the only team they played that's ranked.  From here on out, the Big East automatic qualifier will go to an undefeated mid major. 

- ESPN Gameday will attempt to give credit to the way Boise State's season finishes because they play Fresno State, Nevada, and Utah State.  Joe Paterno will toss and turn in his grave. 

Thus sayeth the DKW.  May your football watching still be enjoyable. 

[GH2001]

Is this a poor man's "Cavalcade of Whimsy"?

[Townhallsavoy]

Is this a poor man's "Cavalcade of Whimsy"?

Cavalcade of wha? 

This is an attempt to spark conversation.  Debate.  Interest. 

It's an attempt for me to be...masturbatory. 

[Tiger Wench]

Cavalcade of wha? 

Pete Fiutak @ College Football News posts the Cavalcade of Whimsey every Tuesday.  Totally hilarious and usually spot on.

Masturbatory? Not sure if I should be  or ???

[Townhallsavoy]

Pete Fiutak @ College Football News posts the Cavalcade of Whimsey every Tuesday.  Totally hilarious and usually spot on.

Masturbatory? Not sure if I should be  or ???

Damn I forgot about that column.

I used to read Fiutak, but he got way over his head.  I liked him because he honestly tried to admire all of college football - from Utah Tech State School for the Deaf, Blind, and Homeless to the SEC schools.  However, I started hating him because I realized he was never going to actually know anything being stretched that thin. 

And baby, with a word like masturbatory, you should be whatever it is you're feelin' right now.  Ya feel me?

[Tiger Wench]

Damn I forgot about that column.

I used to read Fiutak, but he got way over his head.  I liked him because he honestly tried to admire all of college football - from Utah Tech State School for the Deaf, Blind, and Homeless to the SEC schools.  However, I started hating him because I realized he was never going to actually know anything being stretched that thin. 

And baby, with a word like masturbatory, you should be whatever it is you're feelin' right now.  Ya feel me?

Baby, when I am involved with a word like that, it DAMN well better be all about the Wench... whether I am alone or not...

I still look forward to Fiu's column on Tuesday - it is usually good for a chortle and at least one "wow, i had no idea..."

[Token]

Damn I forgot about that column.

I used to read Fiutak, but he got way over his head.  I liked him because he honestly tried to admire all of college football - from Utah Tech State School for the Deaf, Blind, and Homeless to the SEC schools.  However, I started hating him because I realized he was never going to actually know anything being stretched that thin. 

And baby, with a word like masturbatory, you should be whatever it is you're feelin' right now.  Ya feel me?

I think you have to be feeling yourself for it to be masturbatory. 

[Tiger Wench]

I think you have to be feeling yourself for it to be masturbatory.

Nope.  By definition, it is manual stimulation of the genitals... either your own or those of a partner... By yourself is self-masturbation...

So either way... still better be all about The Wench...

[Token]

Nope.  By definition, it is manual stimulation of the genitals... either your own or those of a partner... By yourself is self-masturbation...

What if it's a stranger?  And what if I gave her a few dollars for a cab after she manually stimulated my genitals?  It's not illegal to be masturbated by someone else. 

I think I found a loophole. 

[Tiger Wench]

What if it's a stranger?  And what if I gave her a few dollars for a cab after she manually stimulated my genitals?  It's not illegal to be masturbated by someone else. 

I think I found a loophole.

Yet it is illegal in bammer to sell a vibrator... go figger.  (or finger... hahahaha)  I guess as long as you are doing it the old fashioned way...

You are the resident Po-po... let me know if you choose to apply that rule the next time you bust a hooker and a long haul trucker sitting in the cab of his big rig...

[bakervscarrr]

What if it's a stranger?  And what if I gave her a few dollars for a cab after she manually stimulated my genitals?  It's not illegal to be masturbated by someone else. 

I think I found a loophole.

Why have "a stranger" for a few bucks when you can have "The Stranger" for free?

[Tiger Wench]

Townhall, I am sorry for hijacking your thread... altho you did start it.  On the other hand (heehee), there's just something about the letters D, K and W put together that automatically makes me think 

[Token]

Yet it is illegal in bammer to sell a vibrator... go figger.  (or finger... hahahaha)  I guess as long as you are doing it the old fashioned way...

You are the resident Po-po... let me know if you choose to apply that rule the next time you bust a hooker and a long haul trucker sitting in the cab of his big rig...

I normally just watch.

And I set up a great opportunity to quote one of the best one-liners from Smokey and the Bandit.

 

Why have "a stranger" for a few bucks when you can have "The Stranger" for free?

I like the excitement of breaking the law.  Unless by "free", you mean taking the pussy. 

[Tiger Wench]

If all you do is watch, then why the Kegels?

[Token]

If all you do is watch, then why the Kegels?

Have you seen the type of hookers that truck drivers normally invite into their abode?  I'll watch, because it's sex, but I ain't getting involved. 

[Tiger Wench]

Have you seen the type of hookers that truck drivers normally invite into their abode?  I'll watch, because it's sex, but I ain't getting involved.

I'll bet you wait until juuuuuuuust before he comes, and then light 'em up before he can finish, right?  Cuz you are just a mean bastard that way...