So I've been doing kegel exercises for about a month now. The upside has proven to be magnificent, but the down side is much worse than the upside is better. I can't shit. No, really. It feels like I'm trying to squeeze a 58 Buick Roadmaster out of my ass. I mean, Christmas is getting close and I'd really like to surprise my wife with a prodigious amount of milky goodness across the bridge of her nose and into both eyes, but I don't want to be found dead on the john with a brain aneurysm.
Can I get a prescription for a few hundred epidurals? Or should I just start eating taco meat 3 times a day?
I did warn you.